Friday, January 4, 2008

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Man remains man

MANN is man without the child, now of Marie-Luise Schwarz-Schilling
What?

The male influence on the number of children is related to this day hardly taken note. The male fears of losing independence, spontaneity and status Sitting - barely conscious - in the individual skull. The climate in society reinforces these feelings. guide, future researchers and opinion makers have so far remained silent striking, even those who speak out loud to the population decline, such as Frank Schirrmacher (The Methuselah Conspiracy). Maybe they surprise us soon with proposals. I have no recipe to encourage more men to delight in their own children, but only general information. Financial rewards are always good, especially when they are targeted. The French, we've been doing this for a long time ago.
adaptation? - It is provided merely by men? No, of women too. You have to learn to decide, and the decided to account for himself. Decide man's business was very long! In the children's decision question for men is more difficult because they have to give up historical privileges. I do not like to be silent about this, but just little of it to resignieren.Mit an anecdotal observation I will close. I sometimes meet and together with single men who one day suddenly conjure up a son or a daughter from his sleeve. Never before was the speech of children!
diving at the age of 12-16 years in the life of the singles from distant friends or discarded wives curious search for the father on the road. You are the apple of the eye singles. A Lump thinks only here by an ingenious strategy to slurp the diaper years. Let's say rather: Sometimes the paternal comes later. Better than never.

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man's man - even without a child

long as this climate of opinion remain, and the difficulties of child rearing - That we ourselves have created - will remain, there will be many men in the future, the decision to the child want to or can not grasp.
women must question the legitimacy of a non-existing desire for a child with difficulty, even from themselves men. Man's a Man without a child. Is that all laid down organic? Some certainly. But the impetus of the social environment have since ancient times to enhance the biological scaffolds and / or weaken the behavioral tendency: in the stone age, a male brooding instinct was not needed, nor in patriarchy. Only now, in the democracy of the 21st century society demands parental care suddenly out of Man.

room without people
No one knows what a "natural" population of Germany. The time of Goethe, in 1800 - a period of spiritual prosperity - Germany had (in present-day borders) 18 million inhabitants, in 1900 there were 43 million (Colin McEvedy and Richard Jones, Atlas of World Population History, London, 1978, p.68) 11)) In 1926, the award came from "people without space" and has been reinterpreted by the Nazis in politics. Today, two world wars continue to live in Germany 82 million people and the human poverty the eastern and northern countries makes us worry area without people? This is to show that the "too big" or "too small" amount of a population is almost always a matter of the relevant knowledge and the published opinion.
My concern is not the population density in Europe, even if this was the starting point of this consideration, but the ability to adapt. Adaptation or conversion is a creative process that can be refused. We always expect from strangers that they adapt. We must adapt ourselves as living beings always to new environments, as people just to those we themselves have created only patriarchy, democracy. As long as men - whether for romance or other motives - do not have children, women are rarely risk a child.

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The "fuss"

children today are not destiny but a value decision. From a historical perspective, was given life for a long time less valuable than life take . This fundamental valuation is still not really on the decline. Hence the birth rate since the introduction of the pill is a perfectly logical reaction of the population.
men react more strongly to the fertility society Models. Our models are now individual happiness, independence, mobility and sometimes adventurous. The counterweights: stability, management and maintenance have a subordinate rank. Children are rare in the models.
The Western societies are in the social climate rather than androcentric patriarchal. The "sons" have created the Western system and give it the tone. To date, the opinion is widespread that women less than men and therefore less valuable. Child care - a predominantly female task - remains so in the social standing to the side of the inferior, because female Activities. "Fuss" former Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder called it.

development of the father roles: wet diapers destroy Adult
We define now the child-rearing as a joint task-of men and women - not because it is biologically determined as well - in the stone age it was different - but because the early patriarchs have decided the husband / wife and family because we all prefer, men and women, today's life as a couple (and not as a clan, or community WG). Democracy needs the couple exactly what they used to patriarchy.
The consequences be clear only recently. They mean that the man should help as a non-Patriarch in child rearing, a job that brings little social status. This requires a huge adjustment: Ursula von der Leyen called this the "development of the father role."
your male interviewees from the "star" reacted with horror. The "father figure" called them in the image of the diaper changing wax - from dwindling sexual gratification and falling eroticism. ( www.stern.politik / Germany / 582597.html 08/07/2007) The Star Interview hits the mark. The reporters are talking about and think as many young men. They call their attitude "romantic".

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a child only if ...

we wonder what motivates a man today can get them to affirm a pregnancy of his partner.
Our primary concern is the quality of the partnership, a boundless subject, I can not deepen here. The man wants to be sure he will be involved in the emotional power of mother and child and not marginalized.
  • The man may have the desire to confirm in a family, the remnants of his father's dominance explore and live the still important role of protector. "I do it once better than my father or neighbor.
  • the creative man can entice it to create their own group, with children who have required him to which he be proud of and that he can realize his own child's soul. It is used by some psychologists emphasized time and again that have the male brain interpersonal relationships compared to the female brain much less important. Stringent evidence is not there for this. For the years of adolescence, now until the end of the 29th Year of life is, sometimes it looks like this. Adult men but generally have a similar need for belonging, trust, sharing and "home" as women.
  • Some men learn today that a reward has in the not sexually colored tenderness and affection. What will be initiated in women over the body fluids, can be awakened by experience in men. Fathers who work around loosely and skillfully with children and with pleasure, in the press like to call "new men" - an ambiguous predicate!
  • children structure the time. Children also have the function to wear something in the future, something of me, beyond death. Give children the time depth of field.

Granted, all these motives to choose for a child are "soft". A "hard" factor was against the old need that dominated a generation ago to our lives: If the man wanted sex, he had to take the child into account. Today lack the "fate" that it decreases its own decision.

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no obedience to the fathers

children are now primarily lucky donor.
hide behind this word, many emotions, feelings, thoughts, ideals to which we attach a high social value.
This high value makes us shy about the "other" to discuss factors that reduce fertility in men. Paternity also means that government, was until recently an important reward factor for the man to speak today which is "non political correct". The so-called '68 generation rule deleted with vehemence of his father's program. Many of today's potential fathers do in the meantime on their own paternal authority no illusions: it must be earned. For the female partner is like. Unconditional followers can not expect the man of her. Exactly this was the promised reward for the introduction of the patriarchy. belonged to its promises and that the Patriarch in the woman always takes precedence over the child. Today, he must find that the woman has since birth of a child less attention to him.

back to the old order?

There are always calls that described here reside tendencies. From time to time, appeals to "old values". But: This does not solve the real problems. We can not in the blood relationship and family back fathers exempt from responsibility for children, even in patriarchal systems that where they prevail, make the people poor. India and Pakistan are good examples of how similar companies initially after 60 years sharing with democracy one hand and patriarchy on the other develop. The Patriarchate disenfranchised not only women but also the sons that paralyzes the adaptation to new.
The man in Western countries has enormous benefits of the liberal social order - that is why he created it. But his tendency toward children is hampered by the loss of some important privileges. Are there cultural rewards that compensate for these drawbacks?

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The fertility of the man

little explored and biological mystery to this day is the fertility of the man. What science offers us is the thesis of male desire, his seed in as many female womb to place and thereby feel pleasure. The little experience that we, concerns the testosterone, which is formed in the male body is much stronger than in the female and, in addition to other things, for the "sex drive" is responsible. The hormone testosterone is also an important element for the combative behavior. To put it crudely: "float" power and fighting spirit on the same shaft. The testosterone levels rise after a victory, whether at work, in football or in Kampf.Natürlich also is not a man a mere recipient of orders of its hormones. A wealth of impressions, feelings, thoughts, memories and habits in the game. For men, the sex is but at least twice as much brain volume is dedicated and women. to insemination (Louann Brezendine, "The Female Brain", Hamburg, 2007) The pulse is Clearly, in most male brains created the momentum, the fruit of the seed, the child rearing, such as in storks could be detected up to now much less. In women, occur before birth many body fluids that reward the nurture and cherish. In men, they occur in our region rarely spontaneous. You can be awakened in the best case of a loving atmosphere in the family. Is the love of a child so rare in men?

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What our cultural heritage?

was his father-spätWas, we ask for this excursion into the biology, our cultural tradition says about this topic? It is interesting that the father and his relatively late at a time in the Bronze Age, a social significance erhielt.In the stone age the man as a hunter, brother, protector and warrior was important not as a father. The family consisted of blood relatives, not from sexual partners. The man who impregnated his girlfriend from a neighboring tribe had no responsibility for the child, that was it entstand.Zuständig the man for the children of his sister, with them he was related. This family structure divided between sex on the one hand and raising the other, and created for children a very safe environment, safer than the later husband / wife family, sexual conflicts, concubines, adultery, and came today distinctions threatened ist.Eines day that great revolution which we the patriarchal Call revolution - such as in Mesopotamia around 3000 BC Each man of the upper class was a women acquire property. Hammurabi of Babylon (1793-1750 BC) had these laws chisel on stone steles. By the act of marriage, were now also the male-conceived children his property. From now on, it was important that he could be sure to make his own contribution to raising only their own seeds to come good. The man had a dynastic now - and as we shall see later also an economic - interest in children. He could love her or not - in any case, he ruled sie.Frauen came with this shift on the losing side. The female was inferior and in the same Sex.Die breath and the desire for sexual variety was allowed with the marriage system, only the elites (concubines, servants). Max, the farmer and Hans, the day laborers had few opportunities for what later became "sin".

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The fertility of women

What does the biology?

about having children of women - more recently, through its suppression - is widely published. Biologists and neurobiologists to explain to us about genes, hormones and neurotransmitters, the female body in the life course dominate. The biochemical processes form what makes up the female psyche, they say. This psyche is indeed altered by the many cultural experiences and influences, but is the desire for a child rather "sustainable" anchored in the depths of the female brain. Whether it is a specific child, though today not to say in advance. Between what is conceived as a behavioral tendency in our genes and what we do, is a powerful field, the cultural environment, the inexorable acts on everything, "Congenital" and it changes.

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More men than women remain childless

I represent the idea that most women want children, men but much less frequently. This is evident in many conversations, but also to survey results. 26% of men between 20 and 40 do, according to a survey, no children compared to 14% of women - (Survey of the Federal Institute for Population 2005, see also Meike Dinklage, "The generation strike, Munich, 2005) Non polls, but facts prove that more remain childless men than women. Back in 2002, it was found that in the 30 to 34, 57.5% of men were childless compared to 37.8% of women. Even with the 35-39 years were the numbers of childless men at 33.6% and for women 17.4%. (Christian Schmitt infertility in men, "special issue of the Journal of Family Studies, Wiesbaden, 2004)